Heeey!

How is life treating you these days?

All good over here in Belmont. The sun has returned and the days are longer. Seasonal allergies suck, but it’s all going in the right direction.

We have five new pod friends! 🎉🎉🎉 Welcome to all of you and thanks for subscribing.

I hope you’ll bring some other friends along for the ride by sharing the newsletter, and telling them to subscribe.

There is so much to discuss in today’s edition and we need to get on with it.

First let’s start with the pic: I’ve been a mom for eleven years this year and that is me and my first born enjoying the sunshine together for the first time. We arrived home a couple of days before the pic was taken, after spending a month in hospital. He was a premie – you can read more about this below – and this moment meant everything to me at the time. First born is a big brother to a 7-year old mischievous athletic gamer with the most wicked sense of humor. The two of them keep things fun and …erm…interesting, LOL.

Hope you had a wonderful MOTHER’S DAY! – oh how my heart has softened towards this ‘holiday’ 😆

Here’s what else we’re doing in this edition:

-Studio Update

-Companion Listening

-May Roundup

-Giving Me Joy

All protocol observed (😆 IYKYK), LET’S GO!

STUDIO UPDATE

HEY QUEEN

In the latest episode, we are redefining luxury for curls with Rachael Osborne, founder of the hat brand RAINA. She used the Spanish word for queen to signal how she wishes and intends for afros and other textured hair types to be treated. Our conversation gets into the ins and outs of creating these luxury hats. They are silk-lined (no more frizz or snags) and adjustable (wear your braids and wigs and any hairstyle you want). The intentionality and thoughtfulness that went into the making of this brand will not only warm your heart but make you want to own one of these beauties to elevate your style. Go ahead and check out Rachael’s story and get inspired.

REWIND AND POLISH THAT CROWN

Crownhunt is where tech meets natural hair. Founder, Stephanie LaFlora came up with the idea of a Netflix for hair, as she calls it, after a futile search for a stylist who could care for her natural coils.

Stephanie was routinely turned away from hair salons and when she discovered that the problem was a gap in the cosmetology education, the solution became very clear and she set out to address this obvious need in the beauty industry.  

As a bonafide troublemaker with a background in the tech industry, and a conviction that living with curly hair should not be as difficult as it sometimes is, she quit her full-time job, partnered with a long-time friend and colleague, knuckled down and got to work. And then what happened? 👇🏾

PS. I was stoked to find out that Stephanie LaFlora and Rachael Osborne (above) were acquainted. How could they not be? They are both based in Denver and working in the natural hair space. 👏🏾🔥

THINGS ON MY MIND THIS MONTH

South African Elections

Getting ready to board a train to New York this coming weekend to vote in the national elections at the South African Consulate on the 18th of May. I have to say that I’m very nervous about these elections because there are truly no alternatives to the ANC, which has been a popular (and personal) choice for all who wanted a different and inclusive South Africa since the first democratic elections of 1994. As to be expected, a lot of good things have been happening in the leadup to the polls. There has been no load shedding (power cuts) for the longest time and the government just launched a National Health Initiative. In theory this is a good thing because it’s aimed at making healthcare more equitable and accessible, but a government that cannot deliver on basic services cannot ask for public trust right now. I mean, seriously.

Yhu guys, I’ve never been more active as a citizen, as I have been for this election. I’ve read so many manifestos, talked to people about their thoughts on which candidates and parties are good, and which are doomed to fail. So now I need to decide. Wish me luck. I have 48 hours to make my final choice.

Maternal Health Month

Our friend the internet has a lot of Maternal Health Awareness content at the moment because it’s Maternal Health Month in the USA. Let’s start with a global picture as presented by the World Health Organization. The most striking one being that 830 women die each day from pregnancy and childbirth related issues. Most of these women are in developing countries, which can be read to mean Black and Brown women. In the USA the focus is on communities of color because it is indeed mostly Black and Brown women who die from pregnancy and childbirth related complications. The problem is said to be not as bad as it’s been made out to be. Nevertheless, it’s severe enough that even Serena Williams has a birth trauma story; a story that made her start investing in projects that reduce maternal mortality rates. It’s all good of course, but hard to ignore that this issue is suddenly really high profile, yet Black women have been trying to draw attention to the fact that not all is alright in healthcare. Here are some official reasons as to why there’s a focus on this topic and not so official reasons why we are suddenly paying attention.

My birth trauma story has a happy ending, but I had to have an emergency C-section because the hospital wouldn’t admit me when I complained of labor pains – too early they said, as if I didn’t know how far along I was in my pregnancy. Two days after the C-section I was in theatre to remove part of the placenta they’d left inside me. Yikes.

All this to say, with women losing even more autonomy of their bodies in these United States, it’s even more urgent to support abortion rights efforts – you could argue that this is relevant globally – maternal health initiatives and most importantly, the new moms.

Mothers Are Not Perfect

I have a wonderful – if a little flawed in some ways – mother. No parent is perfect I guess, but I am grateful that she’s not delinquent or cruel, and most importantly, that when all is said and done, she has behaved like someone who wants to be, and is a mother. This is important to mention because the dialogue about problematic mothers seems to be reaching its zenith at the moment. I mean, when you have books titled I’m Glad My Mom Died and the myriad of memoirs topping the bestseller lists worldwide, we can’t help but look at our own complex familial bonds. Another important dialogue happening is about women who voluntarily signed up for the mom job and it turned out to be something that they didn’t expect. Sometimes they leave their families to save themselves and in our society, that is unthinkable.

Nobody can prepare you for motherhood. You can read all the books you want, meditate and all the things, but at the end of the day, you learn on the job. Your children are probably the best teachers and the question for moms to answer is: will you listen to them?

Anyway, I wanted to share three podcasts that I think encapsulate some of the motherhood conversations I’ve been having with friends and family lately.

The Black Mother Wound – Show host Jennifer Arnise looks into the unique challenges that Black women face in their relationships with their mothers. “It’s complex” is the core of her message and she is your cheerleader on the journey to self-love, no matter how big or small your trauma.

Mother Is A Question? – two friends (who are new mothers themselves) speak to other moms to try and answer the question: what is a mother anyway?

Women Without Kids – Host Ruby Warrington – of Sober Curious fame – has no children, by choice. She wrote a book looking at society’s problem with women who have no children and shares some of her research interviews on this podcast.

GIVING ME JOY

The moment I’ve been waiting for since the beginning of the year when I saw Thandiswa Mazwai’s live performance at the Globalfest in New York City- and soon after her Tiny Desk – has arrived. Her new album, Sankofa is out and I’m jealous of all the South Africans who got to be at the launch this past weekend. Thandiswa is also celebrating 20 years of her debut album, Zabalaza this year- I was at the launch for that and I’ll never forget. Winnie Madikizela Mandela was there for the performace at the SABC studios. Chills I tell you. Sankofa is everything we need right now, and Thandiswa proves once again that she’s in a league of her own. Do yourself a favor.

All the hype around WILLOW has me checking out empathogen – first time I’m exploring her music properly and it’s interesting. I’d probably have been in the front row at her concerts in my younger days. I know that people have been hating on her voice for a long long time, but c’mon just say you don’t understand. She’s also not the first so-called alternative singer to voice being rejected by Black culture critics. Anyway, here’s my favorite review of her recent Tiny Desk performance.

As usual, I’m reading a few things at the same time. Here’s what’s got my attention: Niq Mhlongo’s Soweto: Under the Apricot Tree, Imbolo Mbue’s How Beautiful We Were. On the non-fiction side, Jack Hart’s Storycraft on writing narrative non-fiction is my buddy for the time being.

That’s it from me pod friends! Let me know what you’re up to and what you’re loving. Book and music recommendations are always welcome.

Until next time, please do take good care!

Cheers,

Kutloano

(your host with the most)